Friendship is a Two-Way Street

“If someone won’t lift a finger to call you, see you, and spend time with you, then it’s time to lift five fingers and wave goodbye.” – Unknown

Sometimes we find positivity in actions that don’t feel so positive themselves. I’ve learned the hard way that friendship is a two-way street, and sometimes people just don’t want to try hard enough to remain friends. We get busy, we have school, we have work, we have other commitments, we have other friends, and we can forget to do what is most important…

Call. Or send a quick text. It’s not very difficult to keep in touch in today’s digitally dominant world. We have immediate access to expedient forms of communication, and there is no excuse as to why we can’t do this simple task. A simple “hello” is all it takes for a friend to know they’re being thought of.

“Let’s hangout soon” is a phrase that gets thrown around a lot, especially among friends we haven’t seen in a long time. It’s taken for granted and is a trite phrase that has almost no meaning anymore.

I understand my friends are busy, my friends have jobs, and my friends have lives – I do too. I’ve been more than generous and handing out too many free passes. I’m sick of keeping people in my life that don’t want to make any effort to be there. I’ve done my part and I know that because I’ve gotten to the point where I feel almost bothersome.

But friendship is a two-way street. I’m doing what I need to on my side, but I’m not seeing anything on the other end anymore. I wouldn’t call an occasional Snapchat, if I’m even lucky to get one of those anymore, a way to reach out. It’s an update where our friends want us to see what’s going on, but don’t send anything that would require a response.

It’s kind of sad. Are we getting lazier with our friendships? Technology makes it so easy and almost impossible for us to lose touch. I highly doubt my friends (who are also twenty-something’s) live such an accelerated life that they don’t have time to send a “hey” text message. I’m busier than most of them, and yet I take the time to check in, but not anymore.

I feel like it’s draining and is creating more negativity in my life than need be. If they can’t lift a finger to reach out to me, then why should I lament it any longer? I haven’t been happy and haven’t felt that this has had a positive impact on me lately. Sometimes we find positivity in actions that don’t feel so positive themselves. Sometimes we have to put ourselves on a different street to find happiness – a street where both sides operate.


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